Saturday, October 28, 2006

Episode 29: Boys don't cry

He says:

Why are women always the delicate darlings? The cry-babies.

Think about it, women display grief like it's a work of art.

Haven't you seen many an argument automatically swing in favour of the woman simply because the poor baby cried?

The audience vote always is in favour of the woman who is crying, irrespective of whether she's right or wrong.

Why does this happen? Because, men don't cry or break down. Instead, the more upset they are, the more they frown or the angrier they appear. Now, we all know women are more attractive than most men. And, nobody feels sorry for an angry man. In fact, the angrier he gets, the uglier he looks, the more despicable he appears. What choice does he have really? If he cries, they'll call him sissy. They'll say he's wuss. And it's not really macho. So he does what he has to. Pretend he's got buffalo-skin.

Women, aided with a few drops of tears, have no problems appearing convincingly victimised.

The way men and women handle grief is very different. Women think of grief management by getting it out of their system, indulging in self-pity and then rationalising that now that they have been victimised, they have to think of emerging out of the whole situation stronger.

Female bonding and such self-help groups help them achieve liberation.

Men, take the easiest way out. The 'escape' route. A boys night out.

They laugh out the blues over a couple of drinks by poking fun at the situation. Or just Movies. Games. Work. Or just other girls to take their mind of the current problem. They probably cry secretly in the privacy of their bedrooms if need be, but largely, they find ways to escape the situation. They let something else occupy their mind-space.

And before they know it, the tragedy of epic proportions is forgotten or looked at objectively, with a new perspective.

That's because Men don't take their lives as seriously as women do.

Which is why they travel light. They don't think 'Once bitten, twice shy'. In fact, they like the adventure, they don't hesitate to visit old ghosts. They face life with new confidence and optimism.

The scars remain as a mark of the courage they displayed under grave circumstances. The scars that remind him that he's a warrior in this world sympathetic to the female of the species. And he will survive.

She says:


Saying all women sniffle sadly into delicate lace handkerchiefs every time things go wrong, is like saying all men hate to ask for directions. (Oh. Wait a second. All men DO hate to ask for directions. So lets just say you can't generalise with women.)

Just because everyone knows a couple of wet mop women turn on the waterworks at the slightest provocation, that doesn't mean every woman you ever meet is going to be that soppy.

The truth is that most women are far tougher than men. Take their thresholds for pain, for example. Whether it's enduring a waxing session at the parlour, or having a baby, women just grit their teeth and get it done with without complaining.

On the other hand, have you ever seen a man with a cold? He'll bring the house down, shuffle around groaning mournfully and sniffle sadly over hot soup as he mentally draws out his last will and testament. For men are the ultimate Drama Queens. The whole 'I'm so macho I open beer bottles with my teeth' image is just a front.

In fact the last time I saw a man open a beer bottle with his teeth (to impress some young thing in too much lipstick of course), our hero bit through the bottle, cut his mouth and spend the rest of the evening holding a hanky over it and shrieking like a just-crowned Miss World.

And why do people always assume it's the women who cry at movies?

I'll never forget watching Titanic at a movie theatre in Mumbai. As the ship went down, its brave band began to play. But I was looking elsewhere. Because on either side of me there were men crying so hard they could have probably re launched the Titanic.

When a friend of mine got pinched at a mall, she turned around and walloped the guy who did it, though he was twice her size. Another petite friend charged at four whistling morons to shut them up, brandishing her helmet and scared them half to death. At a party, I heard a pretty young thing tell her friends how she ran after and kicked down the bicycle of a man who was kept following her.

None of them cried. It wasn't even an option.

For women realise that collapsing into a teary heap doesn't help anyone, least of all themselves. So they pull themselves together and work out ways to survive. Besides tears can really mess up your mascara!

17 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey.. so is tis really Sud who wrote Sonali's version too? Either ways, way to go! twas adamn funy piece.. thanks for replying to my comment Sonali.

3:03 AM  
Blogger Cappuccino said...

Thanks Diva! Gosh... i wrote this one. When it's anti-women you know who the culprit is!!! Now we're figuring out the grand finale...

2:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good shonali!That was grtt defending!

9:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I say..

Women do cry, and So do men. The difference is Men cry, to cease the pain, bt women cry to convey their pain.. That;s why you can never find a woman crying alone in a bedroom, but in movies...

And dear Shonali and Sunderman,, get some life, Write something intersting, Something, cocky.. Something from real life,with a tint of imagination.

Myelf...

11:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whoaaa!!! that was damn funny...super cute.. the she says part was awesome!!! :D

10:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very well written! Both the parts! Ofcourse we can't generalise, but its important to acknowledge case by case. I know personally stronger women than men!

You have a nice blog here!

7:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

its too much true dat a favour goes to a gal simply coz she cried..

and many a times it happens for the purpose of getting the favour..

boys NEVER CRY!

7:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am desperately waiting for an update!

12:00 AM  
Blogger Prabha said...

this is too good :) really enjoyed it!

12:46 AM  
Blogger Vishal... said...

Made me speechless.. was wondering few things in life are such that the reason behind it, if thought may not be simpler to understand but the way it is posted... wow

4:10 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Right said Sudhish..
He says part was good!

6:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Shonali: Why does the "He Says" write-up go first? Why should the women invariably be on the defensive? Ooh..but then, I definitely don't want the men to have the last word :-D hehehe

Sriya
PS: Do one on the guy and the car hoarding you mentioned!!

10:39 AM  
Blogger Parul said...

Nice post but I expect something more interesting!!!

10:35 AM  
Blogger Sasha said...

good one....

11:11 PM  
Blogger Life Rocks!!! said...

Whenever a guy does a mistake it's "How foolish Mr X is!!" but when a girl does the same it's "How foolish women are!" Always a generalisation..

11:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

can u have a " he says she says " on this topic... " Miss world or Mr. World"pav

11:57 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Boys do cry, but not explicitly.

2:22 AM  

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